1. You’ve burned your pubic hair after a Flaming Sambuca stunt went wrong.

2. Pissed ONLY means drunk, not angry.

3. Bladdered, blotto, lashed, mullered, pickled, pie-eyed, plastered, sloshed, smashed, sozzled, squiffy, wankered, wasted and wasto are just 14 out of 141 ways to say you’re getting pissed (see above).

4. Add “off me trolley” to that list, as well.

5. A piss-up means a party, not actually weeing to defy gravity.

Etc on Matador…